In my previous coaching masterminds that focused on brain training and mind management, I would teach people that overwhelm is an indulgent emotion. When this was first introduced to me I resisted the idea, like most people do. Overwhelm doesn’t feel indulgent—it feels awful! But here’s the thing: indulgence doesn’t mean something feels good; it means we’re allowing ourselves to stay stuck in it, even when it doesn’t serve us. 

Why Do We Indulge In Overwhelm? 

Because overwhelm feels productive.

When your to-do list is never-ending and your Slack notifications are pinging, it’s easy to think that being overwhelmed means you’re working hard.

Even though overwhelm doesn’t feel good, doing the things that actually reduce overwhelm don’t feel good in the moment like 👇

Staring at a long to-do list and forcing yourself to prioritize? Stressful.

Saying no to someone who asks for your help? Uncomfortable.

Setting boundaries around your time? Challenging.

Instead of facing these discomforts, we hide in overwhelm, it’s where we go to avoid prioritizing and taking uncomfortable action. And oh, was I good at it. I was a master of wallowing in overwhelm which looked like: 

• Choosing what’s easy and urgent over what’s difficult but important.
• Staring at my inbox, paralyzed, instead of creating a system to manage my emails.
• Letting back-to-back meetings dictate my day instead of taking control of my schedule.
• Telling myself I’m “too busy” to address what really matters—whether that’s giving honest feedback, setting boundaries, or taking a damn lunch break.

Overwhelm pretends to be useful. It whispers, “You’re doing so much!” when in reality, it can distract us and it doesn’t make us better leaders, colleagues, or humans. What it does do is drain our energy and cloud our thinking, leaving us exhausted and frustrated at the end of the day.

Here’s the other problem: overwhelm isn’t going anywhere.

If you’re like me, you might have fantasized about getting to a place where time scarcity wasn’t a thing, where everything you wanted to do—both at work and outside of it—would neatly fit into the 24-hour cycle.

Let me break it to you: that’s not realistic.

Time for many ambitious people will always feel tight. There will always be more demands, more opportunities, and more to juggle than feels possible. And when that happens, overwhelm will inevitably try to rear its ugly head.

So, what’s the antidote?

I’ll be honest, I still wrestle with overwhelm when it creeps in, but here are 5 steps that help:

1. Own the Chaos

Stop saying, “I’m overwhelmed” and start saying, “I’m choosing to feel overwhelmed right now.” This small mindset shift reminds you that you’re in control. Even if your demands outweigh the time available, overwhelm doesn’t have to run the show. You have the power to step back, reassess, and create a better emotional experience for yourself. It’s not about ignoring the chaos—it’s about choosing how you respond to it.

2. Pull Back the Blanket 

Overwhelm is a blanket emotion that likes to hide other emotions underneath the covers. We say we’re overwhelmed, but what we really feel is resentment because our boss just dropped a last-minute tight deadline. Or maybe we are overwhelmed but also feel frustrated because our boundaries were ignored, guilty because we overcommitted, or are worried because we’re unsure if we can deliver.

When you catch yourself saying, “I’m overwhelmed,” pause and ask: What’s also underneath this? Naming the true emotions—whether it’s anger or worry—helps you address the root cause instead of staying stuck in the swirl of overwhelm.

3. Decide What Matters and Embrace Imperfection

Overwhelm thrives on indecision. The longer you stay stuck, the more chaotic everything feels. When the pressure is on, our instinct is often to keep powering through. Instead, pause for 15 minutes. Block out the noise, take a breath, and reassess priorities, realign deliverables if needed, and let the rest go. Accept that things won’t be perfect, and some things you hoped to accomplish simply won’t get done, make peace with reality and notice how lighter you feel. 

4. Ditch the Drama

Overwhelm loves to make a scene and at times blow things out of proportion. But not every email is a crisis, not every project is life-or-death, and not every meeting is worth your time. Call yourself out on the story you’re telling about how “busy” you are—and rewrite it. Sometimes rewriting our own narratives can reduce that overwhelmed state. 

5. Break the Cycle

Overwhelm often becomes a repeating cycle because we don’t address the root causes. After the rush has passed, take some time to reflect: What led to this state? Was it poor time management? A lack of boundaries? Unrealistic expectations?

Once you identify the patterns, ask yourself: What needs to change to prevent this from happening again? Whether it’s improving communication, setting clearer priorities, or building more margin into your schedule, planning for the future is the key to breaking the cycle of overwhelm.